BROWN and Associates, Inc.
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Tell Tale Signs of a Cheating Mate

By: C.R. "Bob" Brown
Master Investigator

The following is a guide to help you determine if your mate is cheating on you. After reading this list you may find there are some areas of concern. Do not confront the cheater. This will only cause them to clean up their act and make it more difficult for you to catch them. You may not have enough proof to make your case. I would urge you to seek professional help.
  • At the beginning of an affair the mate that is cheating is usually more attentive to their spouse. This is due to guilt that the cheater may be feeling at the time.

  • After the affair has been going on for a while the person cheating seems to find fault with the person he/she may be living with to try and justify the affair in their mind.

  • Cheating spouses may lose interest in the activities in the home. They don't show interest in the livelihood of you or the children that live in the home. Nor do they have any desire to do any fix-ups to the home (i.e.- lawn care, house repairs, etc...).

  • Intuition (gut feeling) that something is not right usually is a sign you may have a cheating problem. "When in doubt, check it out".

  • Cheaters may have a change in sex life (i.e.- more or less sex) as well as unexplained sexual requests.

  • The cheater has a definite change in attitude towards everyone in the home, especially the mate (i.e.- if he/she didn't act the way they do, then maybe I wouldn't be doing the things I do).

  • Another sign is "Finances". "If someone wants to play, they need to pay", therefore keeping an eye on their moneys (i.e.- check stubs, bank accounts balances, credit card bills, etc..) would tell you whether they've spent more money than usual

  • Grooming habits will change. Cheaters will be more attentive to their person (i.e.- the way they dress, frequent bathing, especially females will bathe before going out and upon return, physical fitness, grooming of their hair, switching of perfumes, etc..).

Physical signs to look for to determine whether or not someone is having an affair are:
  • Lipstick on collar
  • Odors of colognes/perfumes on shirt/blouse
  • Wearing new undergarments when going out
  • Secretion stains in underwear
  • Phone numbers on pieces of paper that are unexplained
  • Condoms or other birth control devices
Things to monitor:
  • Mileage on vehicle, time they leave and return from work, paycheck stubs to confirm hours.

  • Monitor home telephone calls for odd behavior (ie-whispering or abrupt hang-ups).

  • Time on Internet and in private chat lines

  • Cell phone conversations and cell phone bills (calls to the same number over and over without explanation)

  • Females tend to have a "glow" about them when having an affair.

C.R. "Bob" Brown, Author of "Investigations- Doing it My Way", has been working and dealing with "domestic" related cases since 1966. He has received the "Lifetime Achievement Award" for his excellence in domestic issues from the National Association of Investigative Specialists. PI Magazine listed him as one of the top ten investigators in the country.

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